KungFuRabbit's Xanga

Wheeeeeee.

Sat, 30 Jun 2007 01:30:32 GMT

Double dates are a bit awkward when everyone in the car but you knows the lyrics to the MCR song playing.

(It was all still extremely fun, though.)

Carrabba's is still delicious, and I am still poor. I got a check, but then spent a huge chunk of it this evening. I really ought to utilize my budgeting skills.

(Budgeting? What's budgeting?)

Tomorrow, I'll be hitting up Rivertown with Mitchell and Dylan. Maybe I'll lift a bunch of shit. I AM NOT GOING TO STEAL ANYTHING FROM THE MALL TOMORROW. STEALING IS IMMORAL AND WRONG. I COULD GET INTO A GREAT DEAL OF TROUBLE IF I WERE CAUGHT. ALSO I LOVE MY GIRLFRIEND.

(Hi, Alanna!)

-MB

mary...mary! no thieving. nooo...no thieving, dammit! i'm watching you.

A letter to the management.

Fri, 29 Jun 2007 02:38:35 GMT

Dear Assholes To Whom It May Concern:

I am writing this to inform you of why the closing run by Robin and I on the night of June 28th, 2007 was less than average in quality. First and foremost, I came into work feeling sick as a god damn dog a bit under the weather. I can only hope that this subsides by tomorrow, because if I miss seeing my girlfriend but still had to work, I will be extremely pissed for reasons I prefer not to disclose.

Secondly, your hellbitch demon spawn hideous marriage betwixt a sadist and a psychopath assistant manager Misty left us a long list of chores to do in addition to the ones that we normally struggle with during closings. Combine this with the fact that we were given random rushes at sporadic times, plus random stragglers here and there like that hambeast duo that came in when we were 15 minutes from close and had everything put away but still insisted on four footlong subs what the hell man what the hell meant that we were rushing to finish even before our closing time. I also managed to sustain an injury while washing dishes, because I apparently can't wash dishes for shit the edge of a metal container was surprisingly sharp.

In addition to these two factors, both Robin and I were completely apathetic about closing, so apathetic that Robin had a visitor for an hour and spent most of her time on Myspace, and I goofed off with Julianne very, very tired from the strenuous work of running a sandwich shop all by ourselves. I apologize hahaha oh that's a good one oh, wait, I actually have to apologize I earnestly apologize.

                Go Fuck Yourselves
                Eager to work again!
                HAHAHAHA OH GOD THAT WAS TOO GOOD
                Sincerely,
                         Mary Brandt

-MB

dear strikethru option: i like you. do you like me?

[ ]yes
[ ]no
[ ]maybe

give this note to italicize option when done.

Best. Shift. EVER.

Mon, 25 Jun 2007 02:35:41 GMT

Today, I went to work.

This was not any ordinary shift, mind you. I was there with Ash and Julianne...for an hour. At 4 PM, Julianne left...and Ash and I had to ru(i)n the whole shop by ourselves.

Oh good GOD, did that turn out fun.

Soap sud fights that culminated in Ash serving customers with soap in her hair (unknowingly), hilarious anecdotes, random calls and text messages to girlfriends, scaring off customers, singing, hiding behind the counter, leaping over the cash counter numerous times, and a couple of people who walked right through the back door because the front parking lot sign said "Use Rear Entrance".

Those two people looked crazy and homeless, and nearly gave Ash a heart attack. She actually cried after the second one. Took quite a bit of consoling. Ironically, the second person came in while we were talking about how scary the first one was. He just appeared behind us while we were doing dishes; huge guy, goatee, baseball cap pulled over his eyes. I think I threw a sponge at him in fear. Ash just refused to stop screaming. I just kept laughing after he left.

Eight hours of total mayhem and random references to Clerks. How sweet it is to work at Subway.

-MB

ash...ash! it's okay! i promise you, he wasn't a rapist. okay? okay?? here...have a napkin.

JAFAX 12.

Sun, 24 Jun 2007 01:06:38 GMT

There is only one place on earth where you can simultaneously find both the hottest and ugliest people on the face of the planet. That...is an anime convention.

If you were completely unable to deduct anything from this, I went to JAFAX with Mitchell today. Saw many booths, ate much Pocky, and ran into Stick numerous times. Left with a DVD of Moon Child, a tofu hat, a myriad of buttons and pins, a Death Note lighter, a couple rings, a Nintendo keychain, and some lil' cell phone dangly thingies.

Wewt.

We didn't watch anything; either we'd already seen it, we didn't want to watch it, or (in Mitchell's case) we didn't have the photo ID necessary to enter. Aww, and we were so ready for gratuitous sex and violence. I was gonna have the violence covered, and Mitchell was going to be all over the sex.

...That didn't come out quite right.

Went home, found out that my mother has finalized her decision to sell the house, we're moving, pack up your shit so we can showcase the house, etc. etc.

And now I'm going to go make a bowl of generic-brand Cocoa Puffs while I wait for Mitchell to pick up the copy of Moon Child. The boy is insistent upon ripping the DVD.

Goin' again tomorrow with my cousin. Maybe. I think.

-MB

Dear Today: You were wonderful. Please do not go away. -MB

Wed, 20 Jun 2007 00:58:43 GMT

Someone call VH1, because I just officially had the best week ever and it's only Tuesday.

Mmmmmmm.

You don't get to know any more. Or do you? I don't know.

-MB

have you ever wanted to have your first kiss fifty times? whoa. shit. said too much.

Subway: the on-site diary.

Sat, 16 Jun 2007 01:50:11 GMT

We figured out how to access the internet on our cash register. Guess how I'll be spending my evenings here?

Alright, so. Subway. No night managers.

Ever.

What does this mean? It means joking around, singing, laughing, making fun of Desiree, moving slowly, listening to our mp3 players, and yodeling out the front door at people in cars that I did not know were there.

Subway nights make Subway fun. Did you all catch that? Fun. At work. In the food industry. Lucifer is buying a parka.

It's almost nine. That means you all have an hour left to come down here and visit me. It's fine; we have friends pop in frequently just to say hi. It's really slow tonight, so the entertainment is appreciated.

Also happened today: trip to Gun Lake with Alanna and Ash. Got burnt, naked, drowned, and molested (but not in that order).

-MB

desiree, you forgot to bread your toast. i mean, toast your chew. i mean...food. -me.

God damn it, I wasted my day off.

Sat, 16 Jun 2007 01:49:23 GMT

So, yesterday was Wednesday. I did not go to the mall, and I did not go to a free movie I had tickets for. I did, however, become so pissed at Mitchell that I hopped on my deathtrap and rode it to his house to find that he truly had left without telling me. Proceedingly, I left a bitchy note for him, grabbed the games I loaned him, went to Nick's to loan him one of them (Shadow of the Colossus), went around town to find cigarettes for Nick's brother, went BACK to Nick's, then managed to haul down to the river to say hello to Sam and Crystal. Lo and behold, there was Mitchell, jumping off of a tree into the water.

On-site witnesses will attest that no one has ever shed an outer layer of clothing and dove into a river so quickly.

Everything was sorted out, however, and he ended up calling me later to spend the night at his house because he was hearing voices and creepy death screams...which we both ended up hearing.

I tell you this because all of it lead up to a fairly sleepless night, which led to me going back home, installing Photoshop CS2, and taking a nap. I woke up a couple times when the phone rang, but I pretty much just rolled back over and went back to sleep.

Eventually, I wake up. I look at the clock, and HOLY FUCKING FUCK IT IS FIVE O'CLOCK. I SKIPPED A DAY. I SKIPPED. A DAY.

Yeah yeah, I know, I've done it before. It just hurts a little more today because I was looking forward to my day off. I have to work Friday and Saturday, missing all manner of social events.

Alas. Well, there's always next week.

-MB

hi, you have reached the house of beth laug and mary brandt. i can't come to the phone right now because i am busy being a lazy ho'.

First couple days at Subway.

Wed, 13 Jun 2007 01:35:30 GMT

Okay, so Myspace just randomly fucking cleared my entry when I was almost done. I am now pissy about it and will make the entry brief.

Second day was today. First day I hardly knew jackshit, and today I would fuck up random things. A lady came in and made us remake a 12" sandwich because she decided she wanted honey mustard instead of regular mustard. I swear she said regular. Ho'.

If my schedule stayed the way it is now, I think I could handle it. Hopefully I won't have to work every god damned weekend, since I am missing a great deal of things this weekend because of said job. EVERYONE STOP SCHEDULING YOUR SHIT FOR FRIDAY AND SATURDAY. JESUS.

If I am ever forced to work more than an 8 hour day, I will kill myself with the bread knife. My blood will be used to make a new sandwich condiment (possibly a thick dip). Grr.

I am fine with four hour shifts. I don't look forward to the next one, but I think I just need time to recuperate. Day shifts are good, I get to do things in the evening then.

Except for today. I have to write thank you notes. Rrrgh.

At least yesterday I got to visit Alanna...and Nazis. You'd have to have been there.

-MB

THIS SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY, AT MARY'S OPEN HOUSE

Mon, 11 Jun 2007 01:33:26 GMT

You know what I found out today? People like giving me money.

Good lord did I get a crapload of cards with tens and twenties in them. Hell, I even got a $100 bill from Sarah. I'm a damn poor kid! We grew up in the city! I HAVE NEVER HELD A $100 BILL IN MY LIFE.

Of course, now I also have to write a bunch of thank-you notes. Crap.

General fun all around, except that my pops never showed. Alas. These things happen...numerous times, over the course of 17 years. For someone who believes that I'm all he has left, he certainly does not make much effort. Something about the pool breaking down at the YMCA? Some work-related crap. You know. Obviously he cannot just let someone else in the maintenance department work on it. Dammit, if I find out later he had a coworker who could have taken care of it, then I will be pissed as hell.

Much thanks to everybody who could make it, and if you didn't, thanks anyways for trying (if you did). Calls and messages were also muchly appreciated. Gracias, guys!

Tomorrow I start work at Subway. 10 AM to 2 PM on Monday and Tuesday...drop by and visit, if you like.

Urgh. Stupid allergies are actually illness, I think. I feel really hot, and I keep getting a stuffy nose/sneezing bouts. Either I caught Alanna's cold, or I caught Mitchell's mono. Thankfully, I don't think I have mono symptoms (COUGH COUGH AHEM THIS MEANS I AM BLAMING YOU ALANNA), but if I did, I would be forced to kill Mitchell. I may have to slaughter him just for giving it to Dylan.

Oh! Nearly forgot!

FAMILY DRAMA TIIIIIIME! WOOP! WOOP! WOOP! ALERT, ALERT.

During the festivities today, my sister pulled me inside to copy a Billy Joel CD for her, and while she had me cornered in the computer room, proceeded to play a particularly grilling game of 20 Questions (About Your Lesbian Sister). She's apparently followed through with her previous patterns and has become a full-fledged conservative! She got all pissy with me and kept frantically denying I was gay, that I didn't know what I was talking about, that Alanna didn't know what she was talking about (yeah, Katy figured that one out), how I couldn't possibly know and how I was just trying being the black sheep of the family. Yes, Katy, I'm striving to be outcast.

In her fanaticism, she also asked a series of awkward questions about Alanna and I and then prompted me to "grab my boob. Come on. You won't know until you grab some boob", which prompted ME to remind her that what the hell, she is my sister and just fucking ew, eject Billy Joel, and hand it to her in silence and disgust. After that it was just a matter of watching her pace the room muttering her distate for her "big gay sister". Gee, sorry Katy. And here I was thinking you were the sister most like me! Fun twist: she asked the most annoying question you can possibly ask a homosexual (that is, the infamous "how do you know"...personally I think the big sign was that I like chicks). I shot back with the ever-popular answer of "How did you know you were straight when you were my age?", only to find that Sarah had already brought that "completely bullshit answer" up to her earlier while defending me. Katy hates me and Sarah is trying to protect me? My world is on its head.

Dammit, I need a Coke.

-MB

wewt! thanks for coming, everybody. i enjoyed taking your money!

Oh, wow. Even more fun. Who knew!

Sat, 09 Jun 2007 14:22:19 GMT

First, hangin' out with Rachel for a day, and then a party at Dylan's? Such amusement! I fear my body does not have the constitution to withstand such merriment. I may faint.

PS- I am beginning to believe that I may be capable of rivaling Sam for the title of Guitar Hero Master. A standoff is just so necessary.

This week (as in, from this Monday to next Sunday), I work Monday and Tuesday (the 11th and 12th) from 10 AM to 2 PM, and then Friday and Saturday (that is, the 15th and 16th) from 5:30 PM to 10:00 PM. Come by, say hi, order a sandwich and say goodbye. The manager doesn't want pals hanging out in the restaurant excessively, so either make it brief or order some shit to compensate.

OPEN HOWSE TOOMORROWZ STOP BYE PLZ KTHX. My open house is from 2 PM to 4 PM tomorow, so stop by, eat some ice cream, and just be awesome. Either bring yourself, or bring yourself and some money. I'm a poor, starving college student now! Take pity!

-MB

my girl threatened to set a man's junk on fire! i knew i made the right choice for a relationship.